Life Crisis 101

You’d think we’d be better at blogging with all of this extra time on our hands over the holiday break, right? Think again! I know Abi’s been taking on tons of extra hours at her internship to get that mon-ay, while this has been my set up for a majority of the past week…

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in the kitchen, in my room, in Starbucks… Wherever, really.

Yes, I’m finally being a big girl and applying to jobs like I’m supposed to. YAY adulthood!

Meh. No thanks.

To be honest, I’m starting to get really jealous of all the people I know staying in college another year (or 3). “Why don’t you want to start the next phase of your life?”, you ask. “This is so exciting!”, you might think. “I do,” and, “you’re right,” I’d reply, but the whole process is ridiculously ambiguous, drawn out, and just plain SCARY. To give you an idea of how I’ve been approaching this (potentially) massive, looming change on the horizon, I bring you to my notebook.

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This is what I keep being told that I should be asking myself, so I did. In big capital letters and with a puffy cloud, no less.

I’ve been meaning to take time to sit down and ask myself this question for a while, so I finally shut off all my various noise-making gadgets and stared at the page to see what might come of it. Unsurprisingly, I immediately wrote “TRAVEL” in huge block letters and started scribbling ideas on how I would do it and what I would want to accomplish. What I didn’t expect was the next point…

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Design, huh? It just kind of sat there staring at me. Where did that come from?

I took some graphic design, computer graphics, and web design courses in high school, but I’m long past being able to use those skills. What I realized was that writing this blog and editing the pictures that it forces me to take are the things I most look forward to doing. I can get into my little bubble of oblivion and completely lose track of time while hemming and hawing over backgrounds, layouts, word order, and that perfect image to capture an idea.

Well, that’s great! Right? I have a life calling.

Um, no, that’s not exactly how it’s been going.

Flash forward. Scene: Me, crumpled in a ball on my bed, my mom on the couch next to it. Cue: Alexa being dramatic.

“NO ONE IS EVER GOING TO HIRE ME.”

Ok, I’ll admit I’m not the most rational person all the time.

Anyway, the point of this is that I was in desperate need of some mommy advice. We all need that from time to time, you know? So it started with, “of course someone will hire you, honey. I think you’re great, so there are plenty of other people out there that will think the same thing.” Mmmm… Ok, not the most comforting first statement. It got better, though.

Through some more encouraging words and reminders of where I am now in comparison to where I was a few years ago, I calmed down and started thinking like a human again, rather than a lost, whiny child. There was a key comparison made that I latched on to, which was, “remember how you used to say that that boy you dated in high school was ‘too cool’ for you before you two started hanging out? Now you think he’s kind of a dork. If you think about it, all of these companies that you think are ‘so great’ and ‘too cool’ to hire you just seem that way because you don’t know them yet.” Once I stopped hysterically laughing at the connection that was made between a high school boyfriend and job searching, I realized she was right. All of this studying and interning and networking have built up some sort of valuable batch of skills that are wanted in someone’s office. I just need to go find them!

And that is why I, and this laptop that’s been glued to my fingers lately, are going to move ourselves over to a table at Starbucks to find all those super cool companies that will let me do super cool things for real life money. K bye!

– Alexa

PS – I’m aware none of that really connected, and it reads like a kid with ADD would talk, but I guess I needed to throw all of those thoughts out, so… That’s what you get. πŸ™‚

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6 thoughts on “Life Crisis 101

  1. Ooooohhhh how exciting!!! I LOVE that you’re following your heart. Is it possible to go to design school so that you can avoid entering the “real world” for a couple of more years? Maybe study design abroad? I know there is a great school in BA for design!

    • Don’t even tempt me! It’s funny you mention that because I wanted to visit some of the design schools in BA while we were there but never worked up the courage to do it. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that I get a money tree for Christmas… Then I’d be there in a SECOND!

    • I like how you always know who originates these ideas/quotes/concepts. Had no clue. I’ll get right on that simultaneous travel and design learning as soon as I get my Adobe programs! πŸ˜€

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